The Paula Deen Dillema

   Paula Deen said the n word…no one really knows when but whenever it was, it was in private and the poor woman keeps digging a bigger hole for herself attempting to amend the situation. In all honesty, I have not seen media coverage slaying a celebrity like this since Charlie Sheen. Though Charlie was already a known sloth, and Paula Deen has been like a grandmother figure for years. The similarities of the two are this…who gives a hoot. Is Paula Deen’s character on trial in every home across America? Do you have to be one hundred percent, never failing and always on point in order to COOK SOUTHERN?

    I am not a Paula Deen fan, I have always thought she “put on” just a little too much southern accent and flair for her brand. Just like many country music stars do. That being said I think she is being treated unfairly. A little about me, I work in a southern country club-old money and outdated ideas come to the country club…many like those espoused by Deen in a recent description of a “plantation themed wedding” she had planned but nixed the idea. I also work in an environment where the majority are black males. They want to retire from this club, because they say it is the easiest money they have ever made. Listening to feedback from them, they all say “leave Paula Deen alone” “seriously cover some real news” “Paula Deen said the n word? In her own house? Thirty years ago”…”well I get drunk in my house every night and call all you people crackers and worse am I gonna lose my job for what I say in my house?”. 

    Can  what someone says in emotional moments, tired moments, worried moments or dark hours be used to judge their entire character and smear their life work. For that matter, should their faults be at the judging table for the world to see? I wonder how many celebrities have used the n word or worse. How many dont use the n word, never have and never will, but are worse kinds of people then Paula Deen who is just an older southern woman? What is really at the discussion table here? A friend of mine, who is also a black male had this to say “leave that lady alone, she ain’t no racist. She said this in 1983 and she ain’t bothering me. Go to the other end of Birmingham and see how the rest of us live and talk about ways to change it. Find something worth reporting and just leave her alone”. Well God bless his heart. He also thinks Paul “Bear” Bryant was a “known racist” and that it is funny that even black people in the south wear hounds tooth print in football season. I did some research on that…it is not “known” that the Bear was a racist. It is “known” that he was constrained by the school and Governor George Wallace at the time, and just did not push it…until the legendary loss to the Trojans (an integrated team) in 1970 gave Bryant the leverage needed in his argument to integrate the Crimson Tide. So it is all in how we want to interpret our heroes, here in the south. Being southern, we are all judged by our history and the threads of our culture that may pop up in our discussions. Any discussion, topic or event has the potential to be a sticky situation. No matter how we try to amend it, no matter how we try to avoid it. This goes for blacks and whites. Go on a shopping trip with me and one of my best girl friends who is not white. Some of the looks that we each get from the opposite race for daring to be in the same company as the other, would put the Paula Deen scandal under the table. God forbid I go see a movie with a black male friend, and it is not the white guys giving me “go to hell looks”. Nobody is exempt and nobody is innocent here.  Did Bryant ever use the “n” word. I have heard that he did…it was probably in private, or in meetings. We hear that he said “I want some of those fast “n******”. It is also said  that the line was “I need some of those fast Negroes”. Like I said, what is the argument worth? If he was and if he was not, here in Alabama to speak ill of the Bear is essentially to speak ill of the Christ, God bless you (unless you are an Auburn fan and then you just don’t count). Everyone has opinions and thoughts, should their gift in society be thrown out, or should it be picked in spite of their issues. 

    The south and those who have grown up in the south have in our culture threads of racism. It still exists or we wouldn’t be slaying Paula Deen. What is racism or how is proof of racism defined? How does it continue to live? Does it continue to live because broad and loud proclamations are made on every media outlet? A friend told me “I don’t care who calls me a nigger, that is their problem, not mine. I know I am not one. A nigger is a user, a lazy trashing low life. I’m not that and I know I’m not that, so they can call me what they want to. For me to argue and and get offended is to lower myself to feel I have to defend against a slur given by someone who obviously doesn’t know me”. I cant relate there…but if someone calls me a “white trash whore”….well I can use that same argument. If someone calls me a slut or accuses me of using a “female card” I can also use the same argument. Of course if someone were to do that at work, it would be a different story…but in their every day lives outside work, it is none of my business. Maybe we should get back to the pride of privacy and stop feeling we have a say in the thoughts and minds of others. This is more about the “thought police” and their restrictions then it is a question of whether or not Paula Deen is a racist…which I’m sorry all of us at the country club think is laughable.

 
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